So This Happened

I ate the whole bag in a day. Gross. I feel awful and I don't know why I did it. Tomorrow's a new day.

Hungry Day

Also, another first: Today was a hungry day. Where my metabolism seemed different and I just wasn't feeling satisfied or full ever. I realized, do people who eat normally have these kinds of days? My food was all the same stuff I eat every day. It wasn't that my blood sugar was low either. It wasn't bored-hungry or sad-hungry. My body must have been telling me something. Listening to my body is something I'm totally re-learning. It's sort of fascinating. It was totally a trigger to be that hungry because I just wanted to eat so much and then I wanted to eat bad stuff also. I didn't. Except a bunch of cheddar cheese at a friends' tonight because I was starving. But that's okay because I've been allowing myself a little cheese here and there.

Smaller

Wooooooo! I've lost 4 inches off of my waist and 3 inches off of my hips. HOOORAYYY. People at work keep commenting on how they didn't recognize me for a second, or they say how thin I'm looking. It's a really good feeling.

Friday I have an intake with a counselor at Portland Dialectical Behavioral Therapy. It's a clinic that works with people with addictions, eating disorders, and trauma. The counselor I'm seeing works specifically with people with eating disorders. I do not have an eating disorder, per se, but my behaviors around eating and my addiction to sugar have caused enough issues for me to want some tools to continue to change and maintain this way of life. I am hopeful about the experience.

A client just brought me strawberries from our garden here. They were the most sweet delicious thing I've had for six weeks...yummmies.