Another thing to not have in common with Courtney Love

"Sugar is a main staple in Love's diet, especially because of the 4 a.m. to 5 a.m craving that she developed after living at the Mercer Hotel."

Courtney Love's Food Diary: Addicted To Sugar

Best Smoothie

Today was a good day! I helped Dad put up cabinets in their laundry room. I don't really remember the last time I helped them do any project at their house. A week in, and I have energy and I'm thinking clearer. I didn't stress about food, I brought my own to their house for lunch. Me and Dad had fun.

Also, I now love this smoothie. It's...how you say...hearty.

End of Day Six

Okay I rode it out and although I still want ice cream I am not feeling as desperate and panicky. Talking to a friend always helps, and it's true that if you ride it out it passes. I think the craving lasted about 45 minutes. Maybe they'll get shorter-please?

Made a great lunch with Shanda today, chicken salad in romaine lettuce hearts. So yummy and filling. I made kale chips--they are not delicious but it's a good way to get the salt and crunch. I'm still not getting enough calories each day, according to myfitnesspal.com. Working on that.

Hard

Soooo super triggered. I'm really really tired, which makes me want sugar. I had dinner at Katie's and I was driving home and I wanted to do my usual route to Safeway to pick up chocolate or ice cream or donuts. I didn't, I'm home now, but really really fixated on eating sugar. I know it will pass. I know if I eat sugar right now it will make my blood sugars go up, it will throw off my body's detoxing process, and I will be regretful. It may taste good right then, but it won't fix how I'm feeling. I'm grumpy, I'm anxious, and I'm kinda sad. It'll all pass, but right now it feels hard.

End of Day Five

AND! My blood sugars are going down at an incredible rate. Have lost three pounds.

Feeling so so grateful for the people in my life who have taken the time to support me in all amazing ways. I don't don't how I'd do this on my own.

End of Day Four

Day Four

Blehhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh. Woke up feeling so anxious about food. Going to Heather's tonight to have salad. Good. But I think I need to focus on planning some stuff that's easy to make and filling and always around. That feels daunting with my limited food choices.

On another note, wow have I been thinking clearer. Wow.

And

I feel more confident when I cook.

Also, I'm getting much less uncomfortable without the TV. It was just getting through about the first week; I'd stand there and not know what to do with myself. Now I've been listening to music, cooking, and other things I forgot I did before.

Video Blog from day two

Video Blog from first day

Day Three

Sugar detox headache gone. PHEW.

I CAN cook

I can cook! I've been a good cook for like my whole adult life. Well maybe more like the last 15 years. I just choose not to cook for myself. I hate cooking for myself. BUT what I'm realizing now is that THIS is what I could be doing for an hour after work instead of watching TV and mindlessly eating takeout. It can be like a project. I dunno, maybe too enthusiastic of a goal, but I guess I was just reminded (in cooking my black bean soup) of how fun it can be.

Went to an OA meeting today. Meh.

Still experiencing detox headache.